Why do women cry?

I found the following story online and was really touched by it. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

A little boy asked his mother, “Why are you crying?” “Because I’m a woman,” she told him.

“I don’t understand,” he said. His Mom just hugged him and said, “And you never will.”

Later the little boy asked his father, “Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?”

"All women cry for no reason,” was all his dad could say.

The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry.

Finally he put in a call to God. When God got on the phone, he asked, “God, why do women cry so easily?”

God said: "When I made the woman she had to be special. I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet gentle enough to give comfort. I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children. I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining. I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child has hurt her very badly.

"I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart. I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly. And finally, I gave her a tear to shed. This is hers exclusively to use whenever it is needed.

“You see, my son,” said God, “the beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair.

"The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart – the place where love resides.”

~ Author Unknown ~



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To teach is to briefly take part in a child's life.

Today I am grieving the loss of two of my former students' brothers. One was 22 and an aspiring musician named Myles Davis. He passed away after trying to move a downed wire off the road last week. The other was a 17 year-old boy named Edwin Whitehead who was about to start his senior year. He drowned in a lake yesterday afternoon.

It's not the same to lose the relative of a former student as it is to lose a former student -- I should know, as one of my first students named Kevin Garcia died last year in a car accident. He was only 18. I still feel an indelible sadness every time I remember Kevin's smile. But while losing the loved one of a former student is not the same, it still hurts, because I know my former student is suffering.

I grieve every time I hear about a child's death because it seems unfair, almost cruel. It makes me question my mortality -- am I not as invincible as I seem? It even makes me question my faith -- why does God have to take someone whose life is just beginning?

In trying to answer these questions, I learn lessons that are as valuable as they are grueling. I've learned that to teach is to briefly take part in a child's life. Sometimes I am fortunate and the experience transcends graduation -- I have former students that I still keep in touch with, along with their families. I've also learned not to take my students for granted, as sometimes they are taken away too soon. I have been teaching 7 years, roughly 120-150 students a year. That's a lot of students, a lot of lives that have touched mine. I hope I've touched theirs, too, at least in some small way.

As I type this, I have the Davis, Whitehead, and Garcia families in my thoughts and prayers. The pull of tears at the back of my throat has been with me all day, as well as the reminder that life is fleeting and never to be taken for granted.

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Lolcat of the Week

funny pictures of cats with captions
see more Lolcats and funny pictures

I chose the Lolcat above for this week because it will be appropriate for my state of mind for the next two weeks.

For those of you just joining this blog, I'm a high school English teacher who relishes her summer vacation. So when my department head recommended me for this awesome two week writing seminar for teachers, I said sure. Despite the fact that it would be taking away two weeks from my summer vacation.

Cut to July. The seminar starts today and I am not so "sure" now!! The course is two whole weeks long, from 8 AM to 3 PM every day. I'll be getting out close to the time I've been waking up all summer. Kill me now.

Everyone who's been to this seminar tells me how awesome it is. What I want to know is if it's more awesome than sleep.

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To be a spoiler-bunny or not to be a spoiler-bunny? That is the question...

So as some of you may or may not know (or care), I host a Twilight fan-site called The Danger Magnet. When I first started that blog, it was a way to connect with other fans of the series and communally squee over the latest news regarding the film and cast members.

Before "Twilight" premiered in theaters last December, I used to scour other Twilight sites looking for news. Occasionally, I would find a spoiler -- an interview giving top-secret deets about the film or even clips from the film itself. I confess to often posting these spoileriffic items myself before "Twilight" came out. However, by the time I finally saw the film in the theater, I felt like I'd already seen it. Oh sure, I still squeed with the best of them ... but it wasn't the same. My spoiler-bunny habits had gotten the best of me.

When "New Moon" went into production and the first movie-stills and clips started leaking online a couple of months ago, I vowed not to be such a spoiler-bunny anymore. Instead of only posting news on the film, I began writing book and character discussions, largely inspired by the ones Lauren did. When I realized that many of my readers were "purists" who wanted to "save" themselves for the film, I attempted to walk the same path of purity myself.

And then more movie stills started coming out of "New Moon."

And then the official website for the film was launched.

And now today two new clips from the movie were leaked online.

Again, my spoiler-bunny habits are getting the best of me. I simply can't resist clicking on the links when they are presented to me. My heart races, my palms sweat -- I devour these spoilers like the delicious carrots they are, no matter who dangles them in front of my face.

Le sigh. Maybe I will be more "chaste" by the time they start filming the third Twilight Saga film, "Eclipse."

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Still waiting on my letter from Hogwartz...

*Warning: Don't read if you haven't seen HP6 yet!*

So today I went to see "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince." It was my second time, my friend's first. Next week it will debut on the great big IMAX screen with the first 12 minutes of the film shown in 3-D. I keep hearing from different people that the IMAX version of this film will contain previously unseen footage, but it doesn't say that on the IMAX page. Hm... Or as one of my best bloggy friends would say, hum...

After seeing this film a second time, I can honestly say I think it's the best film in the series. Sure, I know they left a lot of things out from the book -- Voldemort, aka Tom Riddle's past, especially concerning his parentage and early childhood, could have been better fleshed out. Dumbledore's funeral was sadly lacking from the film. We didn't get the scene where Harry dumps Ginny (Are they even officially dating by the film's end? Does it even matter?!). And I barely saw any of the secondary characters. But it was still fantastic, as films go, and I recognize that film adaptations that religiously transfer the book to the screen don't always get it right.

I am happy to hear that the last book, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, will be filmed in two parts. There's simply too much going on in that last book to make it onscreen in a cohesive manner -- unless they want to shoot a 6-hour film!!! And they can always resolve any hanging threads from HP6 by cutting it in half.

I hope I can convince the boyf to see HP6 again in IMAX. He saw with me on opening day, so he might not be as chipper as me about seeing it a second (for me third, hehe) time, but we shall see. In the meantime, I'm re-reading the last book in the series. There's a lot I don't remember from the books and I think I was reading it too fast the first time to fully appreciate it.

Below I've posted some neat things I found on the wondrous YouTube. The first is a behind-the-scenes video on the filming of HP6. The three links that follow are for some really interesting B-Roll footage from the film, showing the same scenes only shot from different perspectives. Check 'em out and let me know what you think!

Behind the Scenes


B-Roll 1

B-Roll 2

B-Roll 3


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Lolcat of the Week

Credit for this week's Lolcat goes to Tasha, who sent him my way:


Pretty funny, huh? I cracked up at the rest of the vampire Lolcats they had. Check 'em out here. If you should ever come across a Lolcat that makes you, well, LOL, please do send him my way.

Have a great week! :D

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And the winner of the Bloggy Contest is...

Hanny!

She was the first person to get all 10 questions right, so congrats are in order to her. :-D Hanny has an awesome blog of her own called Pink Chucks that you really ought to check out when you can.

Thanks to everyone who entered! I hope to host another contest like that again in the future.

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Confessions

I got this idea for this post where I always get my best ideas -- in bed, as I was drifting off to sleep. Happily, I actually remembered it when I woke up this morning. ;)

Here are some of my darkest and deepest confessions (OK, maybe not the darkest and deepest, but still!).

* I am finally learning to drive at the ripe old age of 30. I hope to try for my license next month.

* I hate dancing and do not have one coordinated limb in my body.

* I prefer showers with mostly hot water -- hot as I can stand it. I know it's not good for my skin, but I find it relaxes me.

* I love those little trail mix bags, but invariably I will end up eating everything but the raisins, picking out the M&M's and cashews first. ;)

* Sometimes I like the movie over the book.

* I have never seen snow -- I freeze in 50 degree weather.

* I used to hate my full name as a child but have grown to like it.

* I think I am more afraid of giving birth than of dying.

* I need to read at least a passage of a book before I can go to sleep comfortably each night.

* I own too many DVD's, some of which are still in their individual wrappers. But I can't stop the compulsion to pick one up every time I see the bargain bin.

* I shoplifted once when I was 8 -- it was a sticker of Mickey Mouse and I swiped it from a kiosk in the Magic Kingdom in Orlando, FL. To this day, remembering that still gives me stomach pains. :-/

* You know how they say teachers should never play favorites with their students? Well, I have had favorite students. I try hard to treat them equally, but I'm worried it shows all the same.

* My "biological clock" started ticking this year. Every time I pass a particularly cute baby, I have this deep-rooted feeling I can only describe as a yearning.

* I have crap for memory and sometimes give my students private nicknames to help me remember their names.

* Sometimes I feel like leaving everything behind and starting life over somewhere else.

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What has Twitter done for you?


I first heard about Twitter from a fellow writer on a collaborative writing site. Curious, I asked him what it was. He explained and gave me the link. So I signed up. At first I was quiet, just observing. (If you don't know me in REAL LIFE, I'm the kind of person who likes to scope out the room first before I settle down and become comfortable.) Twitter was a strange new world for me. It took me a while to become comfortable. It was kinda like Facebook, in the whole status update thing. But unlike Facebook, you could @ other people.

What does it mean to @ someone? In Twitter parlance, it means to "mention" someone. It's kind of like instant messaging. Only without the annoying "ping!" sound. And unlike instant messaging, every time you @ someone on Twitter, it is visible on your profile page and people who are following the two of you can see it. You can also DM or "direct message" people, send them messages only they can see.

At first, to be honest, I didn't really get the allure of it all. But I was willing to try it out, so I tried posting a few status updates. I became hooked when people started responding to my updates. In returning the favor, I started gaining more followers.

One of the downsides of Twitter is that, like any social site, there are a lot of pornbots and spambots around. Sometimes they will even follow you and send you tweets. But at least Twitter lets you block them and you can report them to Twitter as spam, or you can set your Twitter account to Private. Another downside that was taken care of recently was the amount of people passing themselves off as famous people on Twitter. Twitter stepped up by allowing celebrities to verify their accounts. If you check a celebrity's Twitter page, like Nia Vardalos (who posts hilarious tweets!), you will see a note above their name showing it to be verified so that you know you are actually following her and not some faker.

Today I use Twitter to let my blog readers know when I've posted an update or to keep in touch with my bloggy friends. My boyf likes to joke that I'm addicted to Twitter, since I even have the UberTwitter app on my BlackBerry. ;) (FYI: You can use Twitter from the web or from many different applications, including some for your phone.)

So what has Twitter done for you? Are you a Twitterer? Let me know your thoughts in the comments!

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Bloggy Contest Prize: Revealed!

The Bloggy 400 Post Contest is underway! Some of you have tried your hand and come mighty close, I must say. But you still have time. I will announce the winner on Sunday, July 19th 11 PM EST.

If you're just joining us and haven't the foggiest idea what I'm talking about, I posted a contest in honor of having written 400 ridiculous blog posts. The first responder to answer all 10 questions right gets this prize:

All of the answers can be found in this blog, so get searching! Best of luck! :)


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Lolcat of the Week


What is it about cats and ribbons? Well, anything that trails, actually. I love trailing ribbons above Tigger's head and making him jump up and try to catch them. Because I am sadistic that way. ;)

Have a great week, everyone! I'm beyond excited for Wednesday, which is officially Harry Potter Day in my house. Squee!!!! :-)

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I've written 400 posts?! This calls for a contest!

This is my 401st post. Which is insane. How the heck have I written on 400 topics? What the heck could I possibly have to say that would amount to so much verbiage?! Like I said, insane.

This much insanity clearly calls for a contest. The contest is this: I will post 10 questions below all about moi. The answers can be found in this blog's archive. Have fun swimming through my old posts. ;)

If you've been my follower for some time, you will probably know the answers no problem. All of the answers can be found on this blog.

The first bloggy responder to post the correct answers in a comment will win a prize. More details about the prize will be forthcoming.

You have until next Sunday, July 19th 11 PM EST to enter. Good luck!


**All About Ana**

1. Name the creature that strikes the most fear in my heart of hearts.

2. What book is the focus of my master's thesis?

3. What is my favorite candy?

4. On which body part have I had an X-ray (my only one)?

5. Name my all-time favorite poet.

6. What is my favorite book?

7. What did I give the boyf for Valentine's Day this year?

8. Where did I go during Spring Break in 2008?

9. What is my all-time favorite film?

10. What is my nationality?

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Bourdain is Back!

(ETA: This is my 400th post. Whoa. Sometime this weekend, I will post a celebratory post, perhaps with prizes. Stay tuned...)

Bourdain is back!!!


The new season of "No Reservations" begins this Monday and this time, Bourdain is going to be hitting up Australia, Sardinia, Thailand, as well as the United States. I am beyond excited because you know I am a huge Bourdain fan.

I am so excited that I decided to create a new blog especially for "No Reservations" and Anthony Bourdain. I will still be receiving previews and video clips from Ingrid for the new season, so if you'll want to keep track, you will need to follow me on my new blog: I travel, therefore I am.

I've already got 2 posts going, including a sneak peek of Monday's premiere episode which you'll definitely want to see. I'd love to hear your thoughts on my new site.

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Snow in July

I know what you're thinking -- how can it snow in July in Miami, FL? Well, it happened. And it happened on top of my head.

You see, last week I was brushing out my hair after washing it and noticed all these large flakes falling down from my head. I was confused. This had never happened before. I started brushing harder, wondering if I'd not rinsed out the conditioner properly or something. The more I brushed, the more flakes fell. I freaked out!

The boyf calmly told me it was nothing to worry about, just dandruff. But I was still all wtf. I normally wash my hair every other day if not every day. I don't put any product in my hair. I normally have clean hair! I used to scoff at those dandruff commercials. Thinking, that will never be me.

I didn't even exactly know what dandruff was or what its causes were until I got it:
Dandruff (also called scurf and historically termed Pityriasis capitis) is the excessive shedding of dead skin cells from the scalp. Dandruff can also be caused by frequent exposure to extreme heat and cold. As it is normal for skin cells to die and flake off, a small amount of flaking is normal and in fact quite common. Some people, however, either chronically or as a result of certain triggers, experience an unusually large amount of flaking, which can also be accompanied by redness and irritation. Most cases of dandruff can be easily treated with specialized shampoos.

Why, thank you, Wikipedia. I thought scurf was something pirates got (turns out I was thinking of scurvy). Arr.

So I dragged my poor boyf to the drugstore and looked for some magic shampoo to rid me of this horrid scurf. And I found this:

It's a little pricier than other dandruff shampoos, but people, this thing works. After only two shampoos, the pesky scurf was gone.

Now my hair is back to normal:


And I will never scoff at dandruff commercials ever again.

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"Smile, though your heart is breaking..." [Tribute to Michael Jackson]


The very first album I ever owned was Michael Jackson's "Thriller." To give you some indication of my age, I had it on vinyl. I remember being scared as hell watching the video on MTV as a little girl, but at the same time feeling compelled to watch it. There was just something about Michael Jackson that demanded your attention. Whether it was his moonwalk, forever immortalized in the video to "Billie Jean," that single sparkly white glove, or the way his voice could hit notes you didn't even know existed, the man was larger than life.

I know some of you are sick about hearing about Michael Jackson. But you have to understand -- this man was a musical giant for so many of us growing up. Not even Madonna (whom I adored and wanted to be as a little girl) could reach the great heights that Michael did. And for all the notoriety he received in his too-short life, we cannot ignore the many gifts he has given to society. His musical legacy has inspired so many artists, from Justin Timberlake and Usher to so many more. Michael Jackson is the Guinness world record holder for the most money donated to charities by a popstar. In my book, that counts more than all the records he broke for albums sold.

Today was the Memorial Service for Michael Jackson. It was such a moving service. I found myself getting teary-eyed at many parts, most especially at the end when Michael's daughter Paris got onstage to say goodbye to her father. I've posted video clips of my favorite parts of the memorial service below along with a playlist of my favorite songs by Michael. I hope they will encourage you to celebrate the living legend that was Michael Jackson.

Brooke Shields Remembers Michael


Kobe Bryant and Magic Johnson Remember Michael


Jermaine Jackson sings Michael's favorite song


Paris says goodbye to her father


Michael Jackson's Dance





Get a playlist! Standalone player Get Ringtones


"The meaning of life is contained in every single expression of life. It is present in the infinity of forms and phenomena that exist in all of creation. In a world filled with hate, we must still dare to hope. In a world filled with anger, we must still dare to comfort. In a world filled with despair, we must still dare to dream. And in a world filled with distrust, we must still dare to believe."
-Michael Jackson


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These are a few of my (current) favorite things...

True Blood
I cannot even begin to describe how much I am addicted to this show. If I so much as miss one episode, I freak. I missed last Sunday's show (it airs every Sunday at 9 PM on HBO) because I was out with some friends, but honestly, if it wasn't for the fact that I can watch the show after it airs on OnDemand (thank you, sweet-sweet ComCast), I probably would've canceled on my friends. Yes, I love the show that much. So much so that I was dying when they didn't show a new episode last night for some inexplicable reason. Does anyone know why?! *Le sigh.*

If you want to check the show out, let me warn you, it's not for the faint of heart. There is sex, violence, cursing, more sex, vampires, adult themes, did I mention sex? So why am I so addicted to the show? No, not for the sex. I promise you. The story is just so compelling. The main character, Sookie, is a very human girl with a very supernatural ability -- she can read minds. She starts experiencing more of the supernatural when she starts dating a vampire, Bill Compton. You see, the show takes place in a world where vampires have "come out of the coffin" thanks to the invention of synthetic blood, which is sold in beer-like bottles and given the oh-so-clever name "Tru Blood."

Originally based on a series of books by Charlaine Harris, each season so far focuses on one book. The show is currently on its second season, and while it plays fast and loose with the plot of the books, it's still highly entertaining. Watch if you dare.


Neil Gaiman
The first book I read of his was Coraline. That was sometime last year, when I first got wind of the stop-motion film adaptation coming out (I adore stop-motion movies. True story.) I liked what I read, so I decided to read another one, The Graveyard Book. Then another one, Neverwhere. And still another one, Stardust. And so I've come to the conclusion that this man simply can't pen a bad book.

I recommend all the books I just mentioned. Heck, I recommend anything by Neil Gaiman. Not only is he a first-rate writer but he can even hold his own in an interview with the devious Monsieur Colbert. I plan on picking up some of his comic books next, which I've heard are phenomenal. I'm sure I won't be disappointed.


Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

I forget how I first heard about this book. At first, I was dubious. I couldn't help thinking this was blasphemy of the lowest sort -- how could they rewrite Pride and Prejudice, one of my very favorite books of all time, let alone include zombies in their revision? Blasphemy. But then all these positive reviews started coming out. I was looking for a new book to read. I looked it up on Amazon, flinched at the cover art, but was more taken aback by the amount of great feedback the book has on Amazon. It was on sale, so I decided to buy it. And you know what? It deserves every positive review it has gotten.

If you love Pride and Prejudice, you'll love this book. It manages to create a new world out of a very well-known and loved fictional world. Read my review (no big spoilers, promise) to learn more.


The Black Ghosts

I first heard of this band on the Twilight Soundtrack. And for those of you who are rolling your eyes at what you just read, stick with me. This band is worth a listen.

The first song I heard of theirs was "Full Moon" off the aforementioned soundtrack. I loved it instantly and it was on repeat mode for many an hour on my iPod. When I finally grew weary of hearing the same song over and over, I decided to give the rest of their music a try. I wound up buying their self-titled CD. And I honestly love the majority of this album. Songs like "Repetition Kills You" and "It's Your Touch" are so catchy you will be singing it in the shower, in the car, in the elevator, to your pet cat ... well, you get the point. They sound a little bit like Yo La Tengo and Beck got together and made a lovechild. You'll see what I mean when you hear the song below:


Full Moon - The Black Ghosts

Pandora

Speaking of music, one of my recent loves on the interwebs is the website Pandora.com. How do I explain the wonderment that is Pandora.com? Well, it's like this: you type in a band or a song title that you adore, and Pandora will play a song that you have never heard of before but suddenly adore even more than that first song you typed in. I don't know what kind of witchery goes on behind the scenes at Pandora.com, and I honestly don't care. All I know is that this website is my new best friend. It's like having your own personal DJ who knows just what you like. Try it out! I've discovered some yummy new bands like The Foxglove Hunt and Moving Units on this website. You can find me on Pandora under my user name: AnaHasCheezburger.


Well, I'm feeling very musical this month. :p What are some of your favorites this month? Share them in the comments! :-)


P.S.) This blog has a new URL: http://threadsthataregolden.com. Please update your bookmarks and let me know if the old URL doesn't redirect you!


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Lolca -- Erm, make that Lolbunny of the Week



Yes, I am fully aware that the above is a rabbit, not a cat. But darn it, it is funny. And it made me laugh. So I posted it. I'm sure the cats of the world don't mind.

I've always wanted a rabbit. I had a brief experience owning one, very brief, when my boyfriend and I found one wandering outside my house once. It was just hopping out on the street, minding its own business. So I took it in and fed it some lettuce and named it Regina (under the mistaken impression it was a girl).

The next day, I got a knock on my door. It was my neighbor asking if we'd seen his daughter's rabbit. Away went Regina. Sad went Ana.

The End.


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Independence Day

Happy 4th of July to my fellow American readers!

As usual, it is rainy and overcast on July 4th in Miami, FL. *shrugs* You get used to it, kind of. All the major holidays in the summer in Miami will invariably feature rainclouds. Heck, the summer itself will invariably feature rainclouds. But I guess I shouldn't complain and enjoy today's holiday for what it means: independence.

That's a word I don't often think about in my day-to-day life. You see, I've realized I take my freedom for granted. I was born with it and have never known life without it.

To give you a little bit of my own background, I was born in the United States to two immigrant Cuban parents. They came as teenagers with their families just as Fidel Castro was taking power. This was back in the 1960's, when Cubans were still allowed to come on planes and not have to resort to riskier methods like they do today, like taking a raft or (I kid you not) getting a car to float because their government would not let them leave. Several of my own students are Cubans who came to Miami that way. I hear their stories of coming by raft in the dead of night and trying to evade circling sharks and the Coast Guard in order to make it to shore. As the "wet-foot/dry-foot" policy goes in the states, so long as the Cubans reach dry land, they can stay. If they are captured in the sea, they have to go back to Cuba.

When my parents arrived with their respective families in the '60s, they didn't have to resort to such risky measures. But that doesn't mean that they weren't leaving for the same reason as today's Cuban immigrants -- they experienced some of the same oppression under Fidel. My mother had two aunts jailed for no reason other than the government didn't appreciate their owning their own business (a grocery store). And it wasn't like any Cuban in the '60s could just up and leave when he wanted to -- you had to receive special permission from the government, or as it's called, la loteria (the lottery).

I can only imagine what that kind of life must be like, that kind of oppression. I can only imagine the difficulties my family endured upon immigrating to the states: having to learn a new language, having to learn to navigate a new way of life. I was born into this way of life and it's the only one I've ever known. I've never been to Cuba and none of my family has ever been back. Truth be told, they don't want to. They hear enough from more recent immigrants about how much their country has changed to know there's no good dwelling in a past that no longer exists.

Today for perhaps the first time I truly recognize how fortunate I am to have my independence. I don't know if I'll ever go to Cuba -- part of me is curious. However, because of the embargo and ironically enough because I am an American citizen, I am not allowed to go to Cuba anyways. I hope this will change some day in the future, just as I hope Cuba itself will change. I don't believe like many Cuban-Americans do that Cuba will change overnight as soon as Fidel Castro dies. I think that kind of change does not happen overnight. It will more than likely take years. Hopefully some day, I will be able to take my children if not my own parents back to Cuba so that we can see where my family originated.

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All content on this site is the sole property of Ana Cristina Simon, unless otherwise stated, and is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

The Summer of Films

I hereby christen this summer "The Summer of Films." I think I've seen more movies in the month of June than the whole of last year. Crazy.

These are the movies I saw in June:
  • "Star Trek" (I is a trekkie now. For realz.)
  • "Drag Me to Hell" (Effing scary.)
  • "The Hangover" (Hilarious!)
  • "Up" (Best Pixar movie to date.)
  • "The Proposal" (Okay, I guess.)
  • "Transformers 2" (...)
And that's just in the theater, not counting the movies I've seen with the boyf at home on DVD. And this is not counting the movies I have yet to see this summer, like "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" (be still, my beating fangirl heart).

I've liked most of the movies I've seen in the theater this summer. "The Hangover" was funny as heck. I laughed so hard, I think I may have bruised a rib or two. There are a few gross-out moments, which I'm not fond of in films, but overall it was a pretty good movie.

"Up" was fantabulous. I loved how surprisingly bittersweet it was -- the first 15 minutes of the film had me bawling, then the remainder of the film had me laughing hysterically, and then getting teary again at the end. Actual line of dialogue from the film: "I am hiding under your porch because I love you." *Dies from adorableness* I love that talking dog, Doug. I want one.

"The Proposal" was only okay. It was kinda formulaic. (I know what you're going to say -- what romantic comedy isn't? My response: "Love Actually." Shut you up.)

And as for the last movie, the one I've been waiting for all summer, all year, with bated breath, the movie that had my boyf and all grown men jumping up and down like a little boy in wide-eyed expectation -- TRANSFORMERS -- and yes, the movie needs to be in all caps and all bold. The flipping movie of the flipping summer ... What did I think of it? Well, it sucked.

Yes, you read that right -- It sucked.

Let me enumerate for you the many ways it sucked: it was horribly written, there was dog-humping, robot-humping, mothers eating brownies laced with pot, robo-sluts, inexplicable dialogue, Megan Fox clearly needs to stop acting and pursue a career in Hugh Hefner's stable, the movie feels like an overblown ad for the military, and oh yeah, there are two robots who are such racial stereotypes, they have gold robot teeth. I kid you not.

But why take my word for it. Read this to see all the other 1,000,000,000 things wrong with the movie.

If I have one wish, it's that I never have to be subjected to such a shoddy film ever again. I knew it wouldn't be as good as the first one, but I had no idea it would be this bad. Blech.

Here's hoping "Harry Potter" will take the bad taste out of my mouth.

ETA: My boyf asked that I write that he REALLY hated "Transformers 2." In case that wasn't clear. And he says this as a super-duper Transformers fan.

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Creative Commons License

All content on this site is the sole property of Ana Cristina Simon, unless otherwise stated, and is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.